At birth, gender is currently classified as male or female – and this has been socially acceptable for many years. However, looking back through history, and listening to people’s stories today, we can clearly see that one’s gender – how they feel and how they identify – is not determined by their chromosomes, genetic make-up or genitals. Although most people with what we perceive to be male genitals identify as male, there are many people with those genitals who identify very strongly as female, and vice versa and all along the spectrum between male and female.
When your baby is born, the midwife and expectant parents will look between the legs and state the gender, record it on the medical records and that is then set when the birth is registered. However, at birth, we have no idea how that child will identify as they grow and develop. While statistically, the midwife may be correct, that is not certain, and making a mistake and saying that that child is male when they are actually female, or introducing them to the world as female when they will actually identify much more as male has the potential to cause great distress as the child matures.
If we were to rewrite the rule book we wouldn’t assign a gender at birth, we would wait for the person to declare their own gender identity, understanding that than can shift and vary while people find out who they truly are. Maybe we don’t even need to set a gender identity at all – in the same way we don’t have to declare our religion, our colour, our sexuality, our intellect – why does it matter where on the gender spectrum we sit?
I wish that the gender identity spectrum was as acceptable as the sexuality spectrum has now become. It will take time, but it will happen. In the same way that we don’t assume that a baby will be heterosexual, we shouldn’t assume that that baby will identify with any particular gender. If they have a penis then statistically they are more likely to be a heterosexual male, but they could be homosexual, bisexual, asexual, male, female, non-binary, agender – or anything in between!
Dr H Webberley
Your ending statement is amazing. Sexuality is a giant spectrum and in the last few years, it’s become more accepted.
Gender on the other hand is still struggling with this concept & although many understand that gender isn’t just the conventional Male & Female, individuals are still being ridiculed for identify as non-binary.
We can only hope that gender becomes more accepted, but with anything it takes time & awareness. Amazing post though, i’ll be sure to share it!
Spot on article .. I have pondered the assigning gender at birth issue for some time. My conclusion is that we as parents, grandparents, friends and society need an identity that we can start to associate with and interact with based a vision of who that individual is and is likely to be… At the core is a name. The child is not just ‘the baby’ any more but John, Emma, etc.. an individual primary label to which we can refer and associate other labels. In our western culture names are gender biased though there are cultures where this isn’t the case… So our need to assign a name goes hand in hand with assigning a gender. And it will take an age to get around that one!
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